I did 23 and Me about a year ago and found a '2nd cousin' (according to their algorithm) who put his background as 'adopted and wanted to find birth family' I reached out to him. Let's call him AJ. After a bit of talking (and that AJ has talked to his birth mother who he found through DNA testing, and she told him the name of his birth father...which he didn't share with me...), that he is likely related through my mother. In fact he sort of latched on to one of the names I mentioned, my mother's uncle whom I will dub CG. I introduced him to the amateur genealogists on my mother's side (both of them my mother's first cousins). One of those was CG's son, let's call him CG jr.
They never really got in touch with me or AJ. This past week I got a new DNA relative on 23 and Me and lo and behold it's CG jr. And CG jr is a half brother relationship to AJ. Still, neither CG or CG jr have reached out to AJ. I'm still the only one in contact with him. My mother said to let them settle this on their own time, but I also promised AJ to help him out.
Oh and for ages here, I'm in my 30s, my mother is in her 60s and GC is in his 80s. CG jr and AJ are in their 50s with families of their own. From birth-dates it looks like GC and AJ mother had their fling when GC was in college, then GC met a woman, married (although this could overlap with the fling and AJ birth) and had a daughter, divorced, remarried someone else and had a son (GC jr). So GC's two existing children are already half siblings of each other.
What I'm asking for here is some help with ideas on how to facilitate this...transition. I already did a 'soft' probe, welcoming GC jr to 23 and Me through their interface. What other steps, if any, would people recommend?
Also let me know if this should be posted elsewhere.